Despite the many lackluster attempts at being presentable, and downright offensive ensembles I was exposed to today, one lucky lady has managed to burn herself into my memory...
Not only is she a cheap, deceitful b*tch (this I deduced from her poor attempt at trying to return 2 year old, disgusting ...men's jeans), but her overbearingly pretentious aura was sickening.
Due to her incredible confidence and fashion sense, she decided to leave the house in an amazingly frumpy, knee length black denim skirt. With golden hearts stitched on the rear in lieu of say...a pocket? (In no way, shape or form am I condoning long, frumpy denim skirts. Ever).
Yes, it gets better. She further epitomized the visual of trashy with her stained and faded black tee, worn off the shoulder...emphasizing those SEXY black bra straps and atrocious, visibly cheap 4 inch wedges that wrapped faux leather half way up her calf.
...Oh don't let me forget the sad attempt at a bleach blonde warrior streak that reminded me more of a skunk than woman. But whose counting?
Mysterious woman in black, congratulations, you are my first official Daily Disaster! You managed to touch me in a way no woman ever has before and hopefully never will again. My senses and sanity were assaulted by your indelible fashion sense and I'm still debating gouging out at least one eye to clear up the images you burned on my retina.
Beware.
--BCB.
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